3.21.2008

6 years...

It struck me on the way home from work today that my Papa has been dead for 6 years. I haven't thought about it in awhile, and it just hit me. It made me really sad thinking about it. He has always kind of been like a hero to me, because he was a Pear Harbor survivor and I remember being younger thinking that sounded so amazing. It really was. He didn't talk that much, but I know he loved me. He loved birds and bird watching. He loved to work out in the yard. He loved flowers. He loved to sit in his sunroom and read about birds and listen to Shania Twain..he was really into her....I remember how he whistled alot, he taught me how. He taught me how to drive (well, not really..he sat in the passenger seat and didn't talk to or yell at me like my parents did) He was really into bling...I mean, really into bling bling. He had gold letters with his name on the side of his truck. He like pimped his own ride, even after he couldnt drive. I remember my dad telling me once he was gone as a teenager and he came back and Papa had painted his car really bright colors...He ordered stuff off of QVC and infomercials. He wore gold jewelry. He gave me his necklace once, he took it right off his neck and put it on mine. It made me feel so special....he bought me a Poloroid camera when I wanted one so badly. I still have it...I listened to him talk about birds and tell me about them, when really I didnt care about the birds.....I used to go to the hospital late at night..when noone was there and I just sat and talked to him when he couldnt talk back. I remember how he managed to tell me he loved me, and was proud of me and he told me how much my Nana really loved me. And I sat with him all that night, and he died the next day. I just felt like remembering him today. His funeral was on a very chilly sunny March day and I remember the other men..the Pearl Harbor survivors that were there to honor him. I saw one weep, and I realized that most of them are gone. My cousins sang at the funeral and it was beautiful...I really miss him. I would put up with bird watching and Shania music if I could spend another day with him.......
"We can cry with hope, we can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope.."