thanksgiving and fear

I'm trying out a new blogger app so sorry if its all over the place..;)
I survived Thanksgiving and had a great time with my family. I feel like I'm an emotional roller coaster.. I'm fine one minute and falling apart the next.
I've never been too fearful of a person, I have always flown by the seat of my pants..unless it involves heights.. haha. I have become fearful of everything..I am scared for my kids, getting in the car, scotty having a hunting accident, I have even thought about what if I get pregnant and something horrible happens to me during childbirth.. and I'm not even pregnant.. I'm sure its just hormones. I talked with my mom about this and she helped me feel a little better. I keep praying. I don't know where all these fears are coming from.
I love reading the Psalms.
Psalm 56 3-4 what time I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God I will praise his word, in God I have put ny trust; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me.
I KNOW my life is in His hands, my children and my husband.. His plan for our lives is already mapped out.
Last fall was so hard, this time last year scotty was fighting for his life and I was begging and pleading to God to save him. Scotty is here, and for that I am ever thankful. The holidays last year were soo hard, I just knew this year would be so much better. I never dreamed my baby would go to meet Jesus. I am so thankful we are here and healthy, but I miss my baby. I grieve for her... I want her back. I'm happy she's in heaven. But it HURTS. I want to be happy, I don't want to live in fear. Pray for me..
I'm so thankful I'm carried by prayer every day.
Ryan Elizabeth.. because of you, I love your brothers and sister a little more if that's possible..because if you, I squeeze them a little tighter. Because of you, I love your daddy more. And hold him a little tighter too. Because of you, my faith is stronger. Because of you, I will love more deeply and cherish the small things.

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The Mama said...

Praying for you. I am sure the holidays are extra hard this year. Praying that you can lean on God and know that Jesus is holding your sweet angel in heaven.

Melody said...

Hey Ashley, I just wanted to check on you and see how you are doing!

"We can cry with hope, we can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope.."