1.06.2011

Thursday





I decided I needed a change. Sometimes I feel like I just look terrible, kwim?

When I left my house this morning my hair was dark.(first picture.) When I came home it was much more highlighted.

I felt really bad about myself after I saw Christmas pictures. I felt like a whale. So I started running again and eating clean. Has nothing to do with the new year. No resolutions for me.

I think 20 lbs off would make me feel fabulous, ya know?

Ryan's headstone came in. My grandpa ordered it himself and put it in. He is very special to me. Losing Ryan has really bothered him..I drove by one day and saw him visiting her and my heart crumbled..I heard him tell my Memaw "but I was looking so forward to rocking her in the swing on the back porch.."

I haven't talked much about Scotty lately, but I would like to ask for prayers for him. He is now approved for disability. We haven't gotten a paycheck since the first of November. Please pray we get a check soon. Sometimes it takes awhile. He is waiting on a heart cath test scheduled to confirm a diagnosis of pulmonary hypertension. When you Google it, you get rare.deadly.short life expectancy. Most don't make it 5 years after diagnosis. Please please pray for him and that if he has this awful disease that its not in stage 4 or advanced and that he can be treated with drugs for a long time. It is incurable and I don't like to think about it at all but I ask that you please pray for him..(and me.)
He has decided to switch careers while on disability and become a nurse after becoming sick.
Our lives have changed a ton lately and I am learning to accept these changes...its been very hard. I've been bitter, angry, and sad about them. But I know God has a better plan. My attitude hasn't been the best lately and I pray for his mercy and grace every day...

I totally did not mean for this to become a sad post..I am very blessed and so grateful.
Thanks for your prayers..:-)


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3 comments:

Melody said...

I like your hair. I'm sorry about scotty. I hope his new career works out well. I'm sure the diet will help you feel better too.

My New Normal said...

What a beautiful headstone, oh and cute hair too!

Just started following you. Sadly, I know what you are going through. Hang in there!

Unknown said...

I HEAR YOU on the WHALE situation. I am in the same boat, eating clean and TREADMILLING IT GIRL! You alwasys look GORGEOUS to me! STAY STRONG!

"We can cry with hope, we can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope.."