All that I can think about.

I am alone for the first night since Ryan was born, and I am not liking it. Scotty is in the hospital and although I am very used to being alone, I haven't been alone since the day I came home from the hospital. We decided it was just easier for me to come home tonight so we wouldn't have to leave three kids overnight with anyone, because it can be a chore getting them ready for bed and up in the morning...

I guess being alone I really feel like I can cry. I know Scotty hates to see me crying...

“In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuiness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ … receiving the end of your faith, the salvation of your souls.” (1 Peter 1:6-9)

“But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold.” (Job 23:10)

Please continue to pray for Scotty, he will probably been in the hospital another day or two.


My New Normal said...

Being alone gets easier, but sometimes I appreciate the ability to cry without upsetting my husband. So it's not all bad I suppose.

I hope your Scotty gets to come home soon.

Melody said...

I hope Scotty is ok. I'm sorry about your baby Ryan. You are strong. I'm sure it gets easier even if it never goes away.

Nic said...

Thinking about you...Hugs!!

Nicole said...

My heart is breaking for you. I understand exactly what you're saying though. I agree with New Normal...sometims it is nice to be able to let it all out without upsetting anyone else. I know that just recently I had a little alone time, and I cried from the depths of my soul. I cried harder than I have since right after we lost our daughter.
I hope your husband is okay and gets to come home very soon.

Sending love and prayers!!!

"We can cry with hope, we can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope.."